Sometimes there just isn't a reason.

It is one thing to feel sad when there is a reason to. When someone dies, or someone is hurt... even if someone says or does something that hurts my feelings. Then it's understandable. It's normal to feel sad in those situations.

But nothing bothers me more than feeling sad when there is no apparent reason whatsoever. God is still God. I have a beautiful family, a good job. Blessing upon blessing upon blessing I could count. But I just feel sad. Is this a woman thing, or do men feel it, too? Or, even worse... is it just me? Do normal people only feel sad when there is a reason?

Sometimes, for no reason at all, I just hurt inside. I feel like I'm not enough. I feel like giving up. I feel tired. Not sleepy, but weary. I start being short with the people I love, even though they don't deserve it. Why bring them down? It's certainly not what I want. And yet, it's what I do.

Your eye is a lamp for your body. A pure eye lets sunshine into your soul, but an evil eye plunges you into darkness. (Matthew 6)

I used to think this was talking about what you let yourself see. Good movies, vs bad movies, etc. But the older I get and the more I ponder it, I think it means HOW we see things. A pure eye sees with a Godly perspective. An evil eye sees only the worst. We see a lot of things with our eyes. And we always have an opportunity to respond with love, hope, optimism, wisdom. But at the same time, we have the opportunity to see the worst, to believe Satan, to believe there is no hope. And nothing will plunge you into darkness faster.

This is possibly the strongest weapon Satan has in my life. Nothing incapacitates me faster than to lose hope. The hope and vision that God has placed in my heart is what spurs me on... it makes me want to do great things in His kingdom. When I am inspired, nothing seems impossible. And if anyone tells me it can't be done, I wonder why they can't see how easily it could.

So I guess there's the reason. Satan doesn't want any of us to have that kind of optimism. Satan doesn't want us to do anything great for God's kingdom. Satan would rather have us beaten down, incapacitated. And his only weapon is getting us to believe a lie.

If I'm sad and there is no reason for it... isn't that sadness just a lie? It's an attack of the enemy. I refuse to sit back any longer, just letting him dictate my feelings. I am going to remind myself of all the blessings God has poured out on us, and I am going to rejoice in the love He has for us. I will rise up as a child of the King, and I once again will let Him inspire me to do great things. I WILL NO LONGER BELIEVE SATAN OVER GOD. It's ridiculous to even have to say that... and yet how many times have I unwittingly took Satan's word over God's?

God has taken our lives and made something out of nothing. He has breathed His spirit into us, and given us great purpose. His opinion is what counts in my life, and He is who I choose to believe.

Funny....I'm not so sad anymore.