And She's Back at School...

Jenelle came home from college to spend the weekend with us. It was such a wonderful, wonderful weekend which ended with the buffet at CiCi's. When it was time to hit the road again, she got the hug:

I've got to tell you, Ellie's hugs make it very hard to leave.

After the fall...me & Whitney Houston

I'm a big Whitney Houston fan. Even though I've never met her, I have spent considerable time praying for her the last few years. Here was a woman who knew Jesus. She knew Him. But she fell, and she fell hard....... And all the world saw it.

I know from personal experience what it's like to have everyone you know see you fall hard. I can't imagine adding to that everyone who lives on the planet. I just watched her interview with Oprah yesterday and she was very open about how even when she was still in the midst of it all, she cried out to God to help her. She cried out for strength. And she loved Him so much and was so humbled by the fact that He still loved her and never left her. I can so relate to that.

I had a "vision" during the darkest time of my life. I was actually driving down the street and it was almost Easter. I was thinking about how foolish the religious leaders were to kill Jesus. Then I heard a voice within me say,

"I didn't die because of them. I died because of you."

I immediately saw in my mind Jesus collapsed on the ground on top of the cross. I was huddled over one of his outstretched arms, and was horrified to see I had a huge spike in one hand and a mallet in the other. As the sin of my life began to play before my eyes I began driving the spike into his hand. I was sobbing..... I didn't want to be doing that to him and I tried to stop. Yet something else would come to mind and I'd hit that horrible spike into his hand again. He would writhe in pain, and I would cry all the harder. I knew the pain I was causing him, and I knew he didn't deserve it. It was my sin. It should have been me. But I just continued to hurt him.

After what seemed like an eternity, I lifted my head and looked toward him. With horrible pain in his eyes, he was looking right at me. I was so ashamed and so, so sorry. I couldn't imagine what he must be thinking, yet I couldn't look away. He looked at me for the longest time.

What happened next completely changed my life. Of all the things he could have said to me right then, of all the things he could have said as I knelt there with a mallet in my hand . . . . . he looked into my eyes and said,

"You're going to make it."

I will never forget that moment. I began sobbing right there in my car. For the first time in a long, long time, I knew I was going to be okay. I was going to recover. I was going to make it. And it was because of Him. It was because of his great love.

Whitney Houston knew everyone saw her fall. Would they hate her? Would they reject her? She had no way of knowing. All she could do was fix her eyes on Jesus and stand up & start using the gifts he'd given her once again. She couldn't control people's reactions, and she didn't try to. I was sooooo happy to hear she came out with another cd, and I pre-ordered it so I could get it right when it came out. If you haven't heard the title track "I Look to You" check it out  here ... it's an awesome song. And the really amazing thing? She said R Kelly wrote this song for her TEN YEARS AGO. Ten years ago, God knew how much she was going to need this song.

Way to go, Whitney.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

There's nothing worse than feeling like you're stuck and there is no way out. On an extreme level, I think of the Alfred Hitchcock story Final Escape.

In that story a killer goes to prison and eventually comes up with a scheme to bribe the prison mortician, whose responsibilities include carting out the corpses of dead prisoners, to help him escape. The prisoner was to climb into the coffin with the next dead prisoner and be buried alive. Later the mortician would come back to dig him out. The plan seemed to go well, but while laying in the coffin the prisoner starts to wonder why the mortician is taking so long. He strikes a match and to his horror, the dead body next to him is that of the prison mortician.

It still sends chills up and down my spine. Can you even imagine being stuck underground in a coffin knowing no one would ever come for you? Alfred Hitchcock came up with some twisted story lines, that's for sure. But this story in particular lends itself to a deep truth. Without hope, we will perish. And more people than we may think feel like they're laying in that coffin with no way out.

We've all met people who can't seem to find a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. A way out. An end to the suffering. Hope. And there is no greater despair than feeling like you're going to be stuck there for the rest of your life, alone and afraid. But that's the thing about God. He never meant for us to be alone. He never meant for us to be afraid. And He definitely never meant for us to be without hope.

He has provided a way out. For all who love Him and follow after Him... there is light at the end of the tunnel. There is a hope that is so great, it swallows up the despair and the darkness, leaving its power over you completely broken. Even if there is no way out of the current situation, He has made sure there is a bright and shining light at the end of the tunnel. Whether it's disease we're finding ourselves having to deal with, or financial problems, or relationship issues... He has the light we need to make it through. Turn to Him. Turn to the light. And the current situation will lose its hold on you.

By the way, I've re-written the end of the Alfred Hitchcock story in my head so I can sleep better. He lights the match and sees the mortician, but instead of ending there he cries out to God. He confesses the sin of his life and cries out for forgiveness. And deep beneath the earth in that old box, a light shines. He sees the power of God for the first time in his life, and he begins singing praises to God.

And those beautiful, passionate, heartfelt praises continue until he meets Him face to face.