Tuesday, June 24, 2008

The cares of this world....

Okay, I lied. I am going to post again before vacation... but only because I happen to be thinking about something OTHER than vacation for the time being! Last night there was a very LOUD thunderstorm. Actually, it was probably more like 4 a.m., but if it's dark I think it still qualifies as night. (Anyway, I'm not getting up.)


This particular thunderstorm absolutely lit up the sky, then was followed by the kind of thunder that actually makes you jump out of your peaceful sleep. In fact, it continued so long we never really got back into a peaceful sleep. While I don't particularly like missing out on my sleep-time, it turns out the middle of the night is a great time for thinking. Maybe it's because my mind isn't full of so many of my day-thoughts, but when I'm awakened in the middle of the night, I consider a lot of things I don't have time to consider during my busy day. It seems like God speaks to me at those times, but I'm pretty sure it's more like I finally listen at those times.


Last night as the storms raged around me, I thought about Jesus encouraging us not to be consumed by the cares of this world when he returns. Now, my first thought was if he warned us about this, chances are he had a pretty good idea it could be a problem. And, of course, it is.

I spent a lot of time pondering this last night. Obviously, there are a lot of things I need to care about in this world. But my desire is to be able to care about these things and deal with them without becoming consumed with them. I have found through my life that being consumed by anything or anyone outside of God is just plain unhealthy. Being consumed with Him brings balance . . . joy . . . peace. Being consumed with anything else... it just saps you of your energy.

So I guess I just wanted to share with you my ponderings of a sleepless night. I know there are lots of things trying to pull us lots of directions. There are things that try to sap us of our energy and our emotional health. There are things that beg to consume us.

But do a quick check to be sure the only thing you let consume you is God. If you need an easy test . . . You can tell it's him because the burden is so incredibly light!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Anticipation

Anticipation is half the fun!

We are now closing in on ONE WEEK from our vacation, and we are in full-blown anticipation mode. All of our conversations include, "One week from today we will be . . . " (insert "picking up the van" "packing our clothes" "leaving Lincoln city limits"). You get the idea.

I know I've mentioned it before, but our family just LOVES vacation!! We love every stop at the gas stations where we load up on snacks, we love keeping the dvd screen away from Leonard so he doesn't watch movies while he drives (you're welcome, fellow drivers) and for me... BY FAR... I love the laughter! There is never a shortage of laughter when we are on vacation.

We're going to stay in a condo in Galveston, and the beach will be sooooo relaxing--there's no denying it. But when we're on vacation, no matter where we go, even simple things like trips to the laundromat are memorable! And finding the little grocery store so we can stock our temporary kitchen? Leonard and Rachel love that part! I know it's all in our minds, but as soon as we leave for vacation, everything becomes absolutely magical. It just feels good to be gone. And it feels good to be there with all the people you love the most.

I probably won't be posting much now until after our vacation, because honestly it's all I can think about and I think you'd get tired of hearing about it.

And just so you know... one week from this moment I will be calling the Rental Company to confirm they actually HAVE the van we reserved. Let me tell you from past vacation experiences... it sucks when they don't.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Make It So

I want to change the world today.

That may sound like a tall order, but I've found that it's not necessarily as difficult as we make it out to be. Through my life I've heard many amazing stories from people whose lives were changed by the small but kind acts of others. I think we underestimate the power of kindness.

One time I stopped at a gas station for gas and there were two thug-looking teenage boys ahead of me trying to get the attendant to let them leave to get money for their gas. The attendant wasn't treating them very well, and I felt bad for them. Apparently they had pumped their gas but didn't realize they had no money with them. They wound up calling someone and went to wait in the car for them to bring money. When it was my turn, I asked the attendant how much they owed. It was less than $20, so I told him to just add it on with my gas. Then as I was leaving, I stopped by the boys' car and told them they could go because I paid for their gas. There was a complete transformation that took place right before my eyes--they went from being tough thug-boys to the most appreciative and kind young men you would ever want to see. They offered to pay me back, but I told them it wasn't necessary and to just go and enjoy the rest of their day. They thanked me and thanked me and thanked me again.

I like to daydream about what God may have done in their lives that day. I like to hope they saw the love of Jesus, and that they realized something about how they want to live life. Sometimes all it takes is someone being kind to you when you think no one cares. I've experienced that in my own life. Maybe nothing has happened yet, but maybe someday they'll think back and realize it was a turning point. That's what I like to dream happened.

So today, I'm hoping for another opportunity. I don't know people's situations, but God does. And I'm hoping He brings an opportunity for me to show special kindness to someone who is really needing it. I'm hoping He will use me to shine light on a heart that feels dreary. My desire is to show His love to someone at the precise moment when they need it the most.

Is it weird that instead of hearing God's voice, I hear Captain Picard's from Star Trek: The Next Generation saying, "Make it so."

Thursday, June 12, 2008

In the Storm I Hear His Voice

Last night our small group was meeting at the church at the same time as the Worship Team was having practice. It's our normal Wednesday night ritual. We always make lots of food and the Worship Team comes in and joins us when they're done. There's great fellowship and no one ever leaves hungry.

Last night, while in the middle of our weekly routine, severe weather hit. The tornado sirens were going off and rain was literally pounding the pavement. It came so quickly, a man passing by on a bicycle had to come in to keep from being blown over by the wind. He got to join in on some great food and fellowship, so what started out to be a bad situation turned out pretty good for him!

Storms scare some people, but for some reason they just don't scare me at all. In fact, they inspire me. It's not that I'm unaware of the destruction they can cause, and I don't wish that on anyone. And I always, always want my family to be together when the storms hit. But the storms themselves, they inspire me. When I look at a sky that 15 minutes earlier was clear as can be, then suddenly it's full of dark, ominous clouds and spiking rain and hail down so hard it's bouncing off the pavement, and when I see the wind so strong it's blowing semi's off the interstate and clouds start to swirl into what could be tornadoes that can literally lift houses off their foundations... somehow it reminds me that all the stuff I've spent so much time stressing over throughout the week isn't all that important in the whole big scheme of things.

Sometimes I need a good storm. Sometimes I just need to put things in perspective. It may not be today. It may not be this week. But SOMEDAY the world as we know it isn't going to exist anymore. And when that happens there are things that will continue to matter, and things that just won't.

A good storm helps me think about the difference.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Backing Up a Couple of Steps...

I have posted about the importance of controlling where you let your thoughts dwell, making the point that your thoughts will affect your emotions, which will affect your actions. I still believe this is true, but as with almost everything else, I've decided it may not be as simple as it sounded in the beginning.

There is a key element that I touched on, but failed to securely apply. And in testing my previous theory, I have found that this element I speak of is absolutely crucial. Remember when I mentioned the quote, "It's not what is true that affects your life, it's what you believe." Well, you can think the right thoughts all the day long, but unless you open your heart and let yourself believe them, it could prove to be fruitless. (Nothing more than "positive thinking")

Case in point: Over the weekend my heart was heavy. There were people I was very concerned about and I was hoping and praying that everything would work out for them. I had found that I was letting myself worry excessively, so I decided to change my thinking, to change where I was letting my thoughts dwell.

In and of itself, I think that was an excellent idea. However, I don't know if it's just the case with extremely emotional types or whether it's true of everyone but it turns out I have a special ability. I can think one thing while I believe another. I expressed to God that I trusted Him and that I knew He had everything in his hands. And in my head I knew that was true, but in my heart I was still full of worry that everything would not turn out okay. Subconsciously I was still wondering what I could do, instead of resting in what HE could do.

It got me to wondering. Is my mind more powerful than my emotions or are my emotions more powerful than my mind? Which would win out when they go head-to-head?

I believe the mind is a very powerful thing. I said before that wherever you let it dwell, your emotions will follow. But that's where I think there may be a missing step. Between your mind and your emotions resides the heart and soul of it all ... your belief system. I think the biggest danger in letting your mind dwell where it shouldn't is that subtle moment when you actually start BELIEVING your negative thoughts. And once you start BELIEVING them, everything can take a very ugly turn. At least for emotional types, it can then be a huge struggle to rein your emotions back in. Suddenly you're not only battling the wrong thinking itself, you are battling the emotions which no longer even WANT to think right.

I think this is a deep psychological/spiritual mystery, and I want to unravel it. I have seen too many people trapped in their own emotional turmoil, where the truth just falls off of them, unable to penetrate the walls surrounding their faulty belief system. In fact, I've been there myself in my lifetime, so I have a little bit of understanding of what it feels like. I understand why the Bible warns us to guard/take captive our thoughts, because they have a direct link to our whole belief system. Our belief system can completely throw our emotions into crisis mode, and it then affects our ability to be who we really are.

I do know that over the weekend, something that really helped me was to start reading encouraging passages out of the Bible. I read things in Ephesians and Philippians about God's love and power, and I could just feel the tension begin to ease. I believe the Bible really is the LIVING word. I believe it has passage straight into our belief system and can penetrate the walls like no mere human words can. There is help for us when our belief system takes a wrong turn. It's God... his power... his love. That's what you've got to love about God. There is always, always hope.

I'm going to continue pondering this whole subject, and I may have more to say about it in future posts. I'd love to hear anyone else's insights and revelations. But in the meantime, I encourage you to guard your thoughts. Keep your belief system strong and positive. Trust God. Because although there's always a road back, it's not always an easy one.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Fearing Failure

Have you ever been on a Rip Cord? It's a HUGE swing-type thing where they pull you up really high (over 180 feet), then you "free-fall" down and swing out over all the people. I've always wanted to jump out of an airplane and I figured this was the closest I'd ever get, so I was anxious to try!

The first time I ever did it, I was with my friends Rick and Jodi. All three of us went together and they pulled us higher and higher and higher. All the people below were getting so small, I thought surely we were close to the top so I turned and looked... we were only HALF WAY!!! When we got to the top, they quickly counted backwards... 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... PULL! And you're supposed to pull the cord out so you fall! Pull the cord so you FALL... it even sounds wrong to say it. Thank God I was not on the side where you have to pull the cord because if I was, you would not be reading this post. I would still be up there.

It turns out it was the biggest rush of my life! I absolutely loved it. I kept my eyes open all the way down so I could see what it would look like to jump out of a plane. But I just don't think I could have pulled the cord that took us from that place of safety to the place of plummeting toward the earth. There were just too many things that could go wrong. I know it makes absolutely no sense. I wanted to do it. I was EXCITED to do it. It would seem I'd be anxious to pull the cord that would get it all rolling. But being excited about where I wanted to be and taking action to get there were like polar opposites for me.

I've been thinking A LOT lately about taking more control over where I let my thoughts dwell. As you may have read in an earlier post, it started with thinking about young couples and how they need to choose to focus on the positive things they see in their spouses. I then began thinking about choosing to be content with what you have. But as of a couple of nights ago, it's taken a whole new angle.

I was walking the boys (dogs) with Leonard and we began talking about the areas where we let our thoughts dwell on the wrong things. By far, the biggest one for me ... even now at the ripe old age of 46 ... is fear of failure. I mostly see it in my work--I fear the numbers not being high enough, I fear letting down my clients, I fear not being good enough at what I do. And if that's where I let my focus dwell, my emotions very quickly follow. I begin to feel paralyzed... afraid to do or try anything. It really becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You think you'll fail. You fear even trying, so you don't. You fail.

But suddenly I realized I can change all of that, too, just by changing where I let my thoughts dwell.

I am a child of God. I can't fail. That's a fact. No matter what the circumstances of life bring--all the ups and the downs-- ultimately I just CAN NOT fail. I am in God's hands, and He doesn't fail. Even thinking about it begins to give me a feeling of empowerment! And when I change where my thoughts are dwelling, everything else begins to change with it. Obviously, my emotions begin to change. Instead of fear, I begin to feel a sense of adventure! When failing is out of the picture, there are suddenly all kinds of things I want to try! And if something doesn't go well, it doesn't really matter. I can't fail! In the whole big scheme of things, I just can't fail! Failure is bigger than something going wrong. Some things will work out and some things won't. That's just the nature of life. But I can't and I won't fail. What a freeing concept!

Now, this is not some plug for "positive thinking". But it is a plug for thinking about what is TRUE. I once heard someone say, "It's not what's true that affects your life, it's what you believe." That pretty much hits the nail right on the head. God loves you and cares about every detail of your life. It's the truth. But if you don't really believe it, it's not going to have much impact. You were created uniquely with special gifts and talents that equip you to impact people all around you as no one else can. It's the truth. But you have to believe it.

You're a child of the Most High God, King of the Universe. You have been set free by His love, His sacrifice. You cannot fail, because He cannot fail. You are free to try any adventure on this earth you want to try! Your life is in the hands of the one who does not fail! Failure is not even a possibility.

Can you believe it? Can you really believe it? 5-4-3-2-1.... Pull the cord!