Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Pulling Away from the Crowd

We went camping this past holiday weekend and I sure feel rejuvenated. It doesn't make sense, mind you, that I feel rejuvenated -- there was a lot of work involved and I STILL don't have everything put away from our return. But something about pulling away from the city and sitting out in the quiet countryside rejuvenates my soul. And for anyone who has ever enjoyed camping, I probably don't even need to mention the healing power of a hotdog roasted over a campfire. Absolutely miraculous.


Time stands still when you go camping. It doesn't matter when you get up, when you eat, when you nap... schedules are non-existent and totally unnecessary. And my favorite part of all? Talking. Talking while setting up the tents, talking while making dinner, talking while sitting around the campfire. We share so much of ourselves during these weekends... talking and listening, really hearing.


I should mention we aren't hard-core campers. We found a nice spot out in the pasture on Jerry & Rebekah's ranch, and Jerry mowed us a little trail to the house that led to the indoor bathroom. Real campers would scoff. We also had Jerry's horses nearby that Aaron saddled up a couple of times. There's nothing like a nice ride in the country to clear your mind and soothe your soul.

So, the 3-day weekend is over, but I find myself energized and ready to face life with a little more passion, creativity, and even a little more laughter than before.

Pulling away for awhile just does that to me.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Having Access

I was talking to my friend, Terri, the other day about this incredible revelation I got. And, of course, the revelation came in time of crisis.

There was a terrible mistake made on an order for one of my clients last week. It was a really big deal. The mistake wasn't my fault. In fact it was out of my control. But as the distributor, even if it's beyond my control the responsibility rests with me. A control-freak's nightmare, to be sure.

I skipped Small Group on Wednesday night because I desperately needed some alone time with God. Then I holed up in the basement and I prayed. I cried out to God, I wrote to God, I read comforting passages from the Bible. I cried out to God again. And it seemed I kept coming back to the same plea: "Lord, please give me wisdom to deal with this. Give me wisdom that's beyond my own abilities. Give me Your wisdom."

And you know what? Out of nowhere came this amazing peace and clarity. I knew what I needed to do. A mere thirty minutes before that, my head was spinning. I had NO IDEA what I should do. I believe God gave me His wisdom to use... and was I ever grateful. I slept well that night and woke up in a great mood. I knew what I needed to do, I went to work and I did it. And everyone involved was very pleased with the outcome.

The most important thing about all of this is I learned something about God that I really didn't understand before. I'm sure I've asked for wisdom from Him before, maybe in a more generic sort of way. And I guess I knew (again in a generic sort of way) that what He has is ours. But I don't think I've ever experienced such an incredible one-to-one exchange with Him. It was literally like walking up to Him and saying, "Can I borrow your fluffy pillow?" and Him saying, "Oh, sure... here you go." I've had plenty of one-on-one encounters with Him (which I do LOVE!) but an exchange like this? I'm not sure I've ever had one... at least it sure didn't impact me like this. This whole experience has opened my eyes once again to the depths of His love. He is always, always there for me.

And you know what? I fell in love with Him all over again that night.

Monday, May 4, 2009

It's easy to be sad on a gloomy day

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to be sad on a rainy, gloomy day? Maybe I should have been a farmer, so I could learn to appreciate it more. But instead I sit here with an attitude similar to the children of Israel, who got so tired of seeing (and eating) manna.

Manna was a miraculous provision for a very LARGE group of people. And, similarly, rain is a very necessary provision for us. Aside from all the "we would all die without it" attributes, rain makes everything beautiful. Many of the things I love are the way they are because of rain. The green grass, beautiful trees and flowers, even the lakes (if you can really call them that in Nebraska)... the rain helps them to be what they are. I should welcome the rain. I should rejoice in the rain. And I think I really could....

if only it didn't bring such gloominess. If only it could rain while the sun is shining brightly.............

Oh, how quickly I forget. The sun IS shining. It never, ever stops. If I got on a plane right now and flew above these dreary clouds, I would find the sun shining just as brightly as always.

And I have to think... maybe it's good for us now and then to remember we can believe in more than what we see.