Quite a long time ago, I felt that God laid something on my heart. When I was reading and praying, I felt that He said he wanted Leonard and I to model our lives after Aquila and Priscilla.
It turns out there isn't a whole lot of information about Aquila and Priscilla in the Bible. But what there is seems right down our alley. We've read all the scriptures that have to do with them, and we've read a lot of commentaries, and so far what we've found is we love doing the things they did.
We LOVE welcoming people into our home. We love sharing our love for God with them and freely offering any encouragement/knowledge that we may have. We love doing everything as a team (it seems most everything we do, we do it together). And more than anything else, we want to focus our lives on doing the work of the Kingdom. One commentary said Aquila and Priscilla made money making tents so they could do the Lord's work. And I would be willing to bet that even during work hours, they were doing all they could to help others see the truth about God.
Another commentary we read quoted a man as saying, "There are two kinds of people. The kind who do the work, and the kind who take credit for it. Strive to be the first kind...there's a lot less competition there." That's the kind of people Aquila and Priscilla were. They were happy to be doing the Lord's work, and didn't care about titles, or receiving credit. They knew that it was everyone's job to minister to others, and they just did it. What a great thing to strive for.
I'm excited about our future. I'm excited to see what God has for us to do. I just pray that we hear His voice and have the courage and the vision to see it through.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
The Dream
Yesterday when I was at home sick, I had a dream about Dan (our pastor who died last month). I'm not good with analyzing dreams, but I can tell you that even with all that has been weighing on me lately, I woke up very encouraged.
It all started in a gymnasium. Dan was working with some people on some type of drama and he had a woman from our church helping him, as she needed it for some school credits. There was a younger man who had been told earlier he could help with it because he also needed credits, so I went to Dan and told him I thought he should let the young man help. Dan explained to me why he wasn't doing it that way and I was fine with his decision, even though I didn't necessarily agree. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the bleachers talking to another guy in our church.
I told him, "It's so easy to have great faith when God speaks to you. Then you just have to trust him enough to do whatever He's said. It's so much harder when He's silent and you have no idea what He wants you to do." Then I went on to say about someone else in our church (that I don't even think this about!): "He thinks he knows so much about God. Well, of course he does... it was HANDED to him. The elders of our church taught us well."
The next thing I knew I was walking down a corridor with Dan. We were talking about the drama, when he said, "You know, I heard you say something in the bleachers that I took as quite a compliment." I said, "What was that?"
"When you said, 'Of course he does, it was handed to him.' "
I said, "Well, it's true. You and the elders have taught us so much about God and about how to live our lives." Then I began to cry and I said, "But it's so hard now that you're gone. I don't always know what to do." And right then, Dan disappeared. I was really upset. I wished I hadn't said anything about him being gone so he could still be there for me to talk to. I cried, "I don't know what to do."
Then I heard Dan's voice say, "It's been handed to you."
And right then, I woke up.
This dream felt so real to me, and I knew it was true. Through everything we've learned from Dan and the other elders, through the encouraging words we've gotten from our friends, and from the encouragement we've gotten directly from God... we DO know what to do. It has been handed to us.
I don't know why it's so hard not to give the world more input than it should have. The ways of the world are not God's ways. This dream was a good reminder to me to put my hope in what I've heard from God and from His people. And even more, it reminded me that what Dan instilled in us for 20+ years lives on.
It all started in a gymnasium. Dan was working with some people on some type of drama and he had a woman from our church helping him, as she needed it for some school credits. There was a younger man who had been told earlier he could help with it because he also needed credits, so I went to Dan and told him I thought he should let the young man help. Dan explained to me why he wasn't doing it that way and I was fine with his decision, even though I didn't necessarily agree. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the bleachers talking to another guy in our church.
I told him, "It's so easy to have great faith when God speaks to you. Then you just have to trust him enough to do whatever He's said. It's so much harder when He's silent and you have no idea what He wants you to do." Then I went on to say about someone else in our church (that I don't even think this about!): "He thinks he knows so much about God. Well, of course he does... it was HANDED to him. The elders of our church taught us well."
The next thing I knew I was walking down a corridor with Dan. We were talking about the drama, when he said, "You know, I heard you say something in the bleachers that I took as quite a compliment." I said, "What was that?"
"When you said, 'Of course he does, it was handed to him.' "
I said, "Well, it's true. You and the elders have taught us so much about God and about how to live our lives." Then I began to cry and I said, "But it's so hard now that you're gone. I don't always know what to do." And right then, Dan disappeared. I was really upset. I wished I hadn't said anything about him being gone so he could still be there for me to talk to. I cried, "I don't know what to do."
Then I heard Dan's voice say, "It's been handed to you."
And right then, I woke up.
This dream felt so real to me, and I knew it was true. Through everything we've learned from Dan and the other elders, through the encouraging words we've gotten from our friends, and from the encouragement we've gotten directly from God... we DO know what to do. It has been handed to us.
I don't know why it's so hard not to give the world more input than it should have. The ways of the world are not God's ways. This dream was a good reminder to me to put my hope in what I've heard from God and from His people. And even more, it reminded me that what Dan instilled in us for 20+ years lives on.
Monday, March 15, 2010
The Unknown
My husband and I work together and we love it. A lot of people have asked if it has caused stress in our marriage.... one woman said she couldn't even paint a room with her husband without getting in a fight!!! Fortunately, that's not the case for us. We run our office together, with my daughter occasionally coming in to help, and we really love being able to be together.
Recently, however, we found out that our situation may be changing. We are going to begin the process of being on straight commission. Now, this could go really, really well for us...or everything could fall apart around us. (During a recession is not the most comfortable time to rely on commissions for your livelihood.) There is a good possibility it could all go very well. However, that's not what I find myself thinking about. I find myself thinking about what could go wrong.
This isn't totally out-of-character for me. I seem to always want to be prepared for the worst. I want to have a game plan already in place, never to be caught off guard. On the other hand, God tends to want to break me of this need for control. Or should I say the "feeling" of control...as we all know the control we think we have is merely an illusion.
As I was sharing this situation with a good friend, she told me something she had read about eagles. When eagles teach their young to fly, they pick them up, take them high into the air, and just drop them. The tiny eagle flails around, probably thinking, "What the heck, Mom??!!! I'm falling!! Hello??? I'm FALLING!" But before the young eagle hits the ground, the mother swoops him up and tries it again.
Eventually, the fear must subside a bit and the young eagle starts trying to fly. And if you've ever seen an eagle AFTER he's learned to fly... there is nothing that looks more beautiful, more natural, more freeing.
I believe there is a reason God is taking us down this path. We are not sure where the path will take us, but we know we want to live our lives serving Him in the best way we possibly can. No matter what lies ahead, our trust will be in Him.
But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
That's where we're headed. But we need to stop resisting the process of learning. We just need to trust Him as he teaches us to fly.
Recently, however, we found out that our situation may be changing. We are going to begin the process of being on straight commission. Now, this could go really, really well for us...or everything could fall apart around us. (During a recession is not the most comfortable time to rely on commissions for your livelihood.) There is a good possibility it could all go very well. However, that's not what I find myself thinking about. I find myself thinking about what could go wrong.
This isn't totally out-of-character for me. I seem to always want to be prepared for the worst. I want to have a game plan already in place, never to be caught off guard. On the other hand, God tends to want to break me of this need for control. Or should I say the "feeling" of control...as we all know the control we think we have is merely an illusion.
As I was sharing this situation with a good friend, she told me something she had read about eagles. When eagles teach their young to fly, they pick them up, take them high into the air, and just drop them. The tiny eagle flails around, probably thinking, "What the heck, Mom??!!! I'm falling!! Hello??? I'm FALLING!" But before the young eagle hits the ground, the mother swoops him up and tries it again.
Eventually, the fear must subside a bit and the young eagle starts trying to fly. And if you've ever seen an eagle AFTER he's learned to fly... there is nothing that looks more beautiful, more natural, more freeing.
I believe there is a reason God is taking us down this path. We are not sure where the path will take us, but we know we want to live our lives serving Him in the best way we possibly can. No matter what lies ahead, our trust will be in Him.
But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
That's where we're headed. But we need to stop resisting the process of learning. We just need to trust Him as he teaches us to fly.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
The Well-Lit Path
I'm back. After taking quite a break from blogging to do a lot of soul-searching, I'm back.
The past couple of weeks, I feel that God has been leading me to a place of deeper trust. It's easy to trust that God is in control when everything is going as you think it should. Or even as you think HE would think it should. But when things happen that make no sense... when you can't understand how it could possibly fit into His plans... when you especially can't see how He could even be okay with it... that's when it's easy to feel like your faith is shaken.
It's all subject to change (my thoughts are evolving) but for now, these are some of the things I've been thinking about:
1. God is in control even when the world seems out of control. He won't leave us. He won't let go of us. He'll continue to give us peace in the times when peace seems like an impossibility. And he will always, always, always bring good out of the situation, no matter how badly it begins. When His hand touches it, everything becomes possible.
2. For as long as I live, I will cringe when people only say God was watching over them/protecting them when they arrive to their destinations safely. I've seen more than enough untimely deaths... but I KNOW God was watching over them. I KNOW He never withdrew His protection. Sometimes people don't arrive to their destinations safely. Sometimes they leave this earth a lot sooner than it seems they should. But that is never a measure of God's protection or how closely He is watching over them.
3. It's going to take me a lot longer than I thought to really understand that it's not all about this world. I have thought I understood that life is really about things that are eternal, that life in the Spiritual realm is all that truly matters. But I've found I still care an awful lot what happens in this world. I come around in the end...realizing that the time will come when we will all be together in a place where life is as it should be. But sometimes it takes awhile. Sometimes what happens in this life is all I can see.
4. I want to live whatever days I have left on this earth doing what the Father wants me to do. I want to help others see the love and sacrifice that Jesus made just so we could be close to him. I want to hear His voice clearly, and have the vision and the passion to walk out anything He has for me to do, no matter how easy or hard it may be. I want to seek first His kingdom, and know I never have to sweat the other stuff.
5. I want greater faith. I want to know and believe that he will show me the steps I should take. I want to spend time in His presence. I want to live in His light.
And no matter where my path leads... if I'm following Him, it's exactly where I want to be.
The past couple of weeks, I feel that God has been leading me to a place of deeper trust. It's easy to trust that God is in control when everything is going as you think it should. Or even as you think HE would think it should. But when things happen that make no sense... when you can't understand how it could possibly fit into His plans... when you especially can't see how He could even be okay with it... that's when it's easy to feel like your faith is shaken.
It's all subject to change (my thoughts are evolving) but for now, these are some of the things I've been thinking about:
1. God is in control even when the world seems out of control. He won't leave us. He won't let go of us. He'll continue to give us peace in the times when peace seems like an impossibility. And he will always, always, always bring good out of the situation, no matter how badly it begins. When His hand touches it, everything becomes possible.
2. For as long as I live, I will cringe when people only say God was watching over them/protecting them when they arrive to their destinations safely. I've seen more than enough untimely deaths... but I KNOW God was watching over them. I KNOW He never withdrew His protection. Sometimes people don't arrive to their destinations safely. Sometimes they leave this earth a lot sooner than it seems they should. But that is never a measure of God's protection or how closely He is watching over them.
3. It's going to take me a lot longer than I thought to really understand that it's not all about this world. I have thought I understood that life is really about things that are eternal, that life in the Spiritual realm is all that truly matters. But I've found I still care an awful lot what happens in this world. I come around in the end...realizing that the time will come when we will all be together in a place where life is as it should be. But sometimes it takes awhile. Sometimes what happens in this life is all I can see.
4. I want to live whatever days I have left on this earth doing what the Father wants me to do. I want to help others see the love and sacrifice that Jesus made just so we could be close to him. I want to hear His voice clearly, and have the vision and the passion to walk out anything He has for me to do, no matter how easy or hard it may be. I want to seek first His kingdom, and know I never have to sweat the other stuff.
5. I want greater faith. I want to know and believe that he will show me the steps I should take. I want to spend time in His presence. I want to live in His light.
And no matter where my path leads... if I'm following Him, it's exactly where I want to be.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Words aren't enough.
I've always been a big fan of the written word. I've always felt there is such power in being able to take others to a place that may only exist inside of you, and help them experience it.
But then there are times like this when words seem to trivialize everything. They aren't enough. There aren't any words big enough or powerful enough to convey all the emotions that come with losing someone at a time that seems all too soon. We weren't done with him. There was so much more life we wanted to live with him.
Dan Thompson taught the people of our church to be genuine. He had little tolerance for a church environment where people had to put on a happy face and act like they had it all together. And he had even less tolerance for a church environment that was harsh and judgmental.
But he loved mercy. He loved grace. He loved being able to accept people for who they are, embracing both the good and the bad, and helping them along their journey no matter what point they may find themselves at.
He taught us to love God with all of our hearts. And he taught us to really, genuinely, deeply love each other. To lay our lives down for each other. And the last few years were spent teaching us to take that love outside the church. Don't just be nice to people .... really care about them. Really love them. And that is how they will see the heart of Jesus.
There is numbness. There are tears. There is laughter and memories. Most of all, there will be friendship. Hugging, crying, grieving. There may not be any words. But there will be people laying down their lives to help each other cope.
Because that's how Dan Thompson taught us to live.
But then there are times like this when words seem to trivialize everything. They aren't enough. There aren't any words big enough or powerful enough to convey all the emotions that come with losing someone at a time that seems all too soon. We weren't done with him. There was so much more life we wanted to live with him.
Dan Thompson taught the people of our church to be genuine. He had little tolerance for a church environment where people had to put on a happy face and act like they had it all together. And he had even less tolerance for a church environment that was harsh and judgmental.
But he loved mercy. He loved grace. He loved being able to accept people for who they are, embracing both the good and the bad, and helping them along their journey no matter what point they may find themselves at.
He taught us to love God with all of our hearts. And he taught us to really, genuinely, deeply love each other. To lay our lives down for each other. And the last few years were spent teaching us to take that love outside the church. Don't just be nice to people .... really care about them. Really love them. And that is how they will see the heart of Jesus.
There is numbness. There are tears. There is laughter and memories. Most of all, there will be friendship. Hugging, crying, grieving. There may not be any words. But there will be people laying down their lives to help each other cope.
Because that's how Dan Thompson taught us to live.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
I'll never, ever let you down
I went with a couple of friends to see "The Book of Eli" the other night. Wow... what a story. It was pretty slow moving in the beginning, but by the end of the movie the storyline was etched into my soul.
I wonder how I will respond if life as I know it drastically changes? I so admired Denzel's character and his unwavering devotion to God. That's what I envision for myself if the time ever comes. I will be the one who willingly steps into the fiery furnace. I will face the lions. I won't let anyone stop me from proclaiming my great love for God loudly and boldly. I will never back down. Yes, that's what I imagine in my head. And that's what I truly hope for.
But what goes on in my head is not necessarily what plays out in reality. (Trust me... if it were, I'd be a much better person than I am). Remember Peter? Who could have been more devoted to Jesus than him? But when the chips were down, he choked. Oh, it wasn't the end of the story for him. And it wouldn't be for me either. God is so willing to help us back up again... to give us the strength to try again.... to use every failure to build us up. He is a loving and merciful God. And for that I am so grateful.
But my prayer is that no matter what I face in the future, I will be able to stand steadfastly for God. I pray that my love for him wins out over any obstacle, any amount of suffering. I pray that what I feel for him in my heart will be the reality of my life.
And life as we know it doesn't have to change at all for this to be the deepest cry of my heart.
I wonder how I will respond if life as I know it drastically changes? I so admired Denzel's character and his unwavering devotion to God. That's what I envision for myself if the time ever comes. I will be the one who willingly steps into the fiery furnace. I will face the lions. I won't let anyone stop me from proclaiming my great love for God loudly and boldly. I will never back down. Yes, that's what I imagine in my head. And that's what I truly hope for.
But what goes on in my head is not necessarily what plays out in reality. (Trust me... if it were, I'd be a much better person than I am). Remember Peter? Who could have been more devoted to Jesus than him? But when the chips were down, he choked. Oh, it wasn't the end of the story for him. And it wouldn't be for me either. God is so willing to help us back up again... to give us the strength to try again.... to use every failure to build us up. He is a loving and merciful God. And for that I am so grateful.
But my prayer is that no matter what I face in the future, I will be able to stand steadfastly for God. I pray that my love for him wins out over any obstacle, any amount of suffering. I pray that what I feel for him in my heart will be the reality of my life.
And life as we know it doesn't have to change at all for this to be the deepest cry of my heart.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Pushing Through
I know I've mentioned this before, but I'm on a mission to overcome my fears. Not to stop having fear, but to stop letting the fear control what I do. I find this fear shows up most in my workplace. As you know, I'm in sales. I love what I do... I love helping my clients find the perfect items to work with whatever event they're planning. I especially love finding gifts for employees to help them feel appreciated. I have good relationships with my clients and it's easy to work with them. That's right down my alley.
The part that is not so much down my alley is going out to find new clients. For some reason, that just causes fear to rise up inside of me (not good for a sales rep). I love to help people and I WANT to help in any way I can. But walking up and talking to people I don't know has ALWAYS frightened me. And here I am in a job where I need to learn to do just that.
I was praying about it awhile back, and I felt God showed me this is something I need to get a handle on. Not just for work, not just to make more sales... but so I'm able to do the things God has for me to do. There could be many reasons I wound up in a job like this. But I know for sure that he is using it to shape me. He is using it to teach me, refine me, and to cause me to grow.
And that is where the encouragement came in. I love when God encourages me. It carries a lot of weight, because He tends to be right about a lot of stuff. And what I feel I heard from God is that I can do this...even without the absence of fear. I can talk to people I don't know, whether I fear it or not. I can do it.
So this is my goal: To do what I know I need to do. And instead of trying to ease my fears, I'm going to walk out and do it right in the midst of my fears.
I may indeed have fear....but it can only control me if I let it.
The part that is not so much down my alley is going out to find new clients. For some reason, that just causes fear to rise up inside of me (not good for a sales rep). I love to help people and I WANT to help in any way I can. But walking up and talking to people I don't know has ALWAYS frightened me. And here I am in a job where I need to learn to do just that.
I was praying about it awhile back, and I felt God showed me this is something I need to get a handle on. Not just for work, not just to make more sales... but so I'm able to do the things God has for me to do. There could be many reasons I wound up in a job like this. But I know for sure that he is using it to shape me. He is using it to teach me, refine me, and to cause me to grow.
And that is where the encouragement came in. I love when God encourages me. It carries a lot of weight, because He tends to be right about a lot of stuff. And what I feel I heard from God is that I can do this...even without the absence of fear. I can talk to people I don't know, whether I fear it or not. I can do it.
So this is my goal: To do what I know I need to do. And instead of trying to ease my fears, I'm going to walk out and do it right in the midst of my fears.
I may indeed have fear....but it can only control me if I let it.
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