The Dream

Yesterday when I was at home sick, I had a dream about Dan (our pastor who died last month). I'm not good with analyzing dreams, but I can tell you that even with all that has been weighing on me lately, I woke up very encouraged.

It all started in a gymnasium. Dan was working with some people on some type of drama and he had a woman from our church helping him, as she needed it for some school credits. There was a younger man who had been told earlier he could help with it because he also needed credits, so I went to Dan and told him I thought he should let the young man help. Dan explained to me why he wasn't doing it that way and I was fine with his decision, even though I didn't necessarily agree. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the bleachers talking to another guy in our church.

I told him, "It's so easy to have great faith when God speaks to you. Then you just have to trust him enough to do whatever He's said. It's so much harder when He's silent and you have no idea what He wants you to do." Then I went on to say about someone else in our church (that I don't even think this about!): "He thinks he knows so much about God. Well, of course he does... it was HANDED to him. The elders of our church taught us well."

The next thing I knew I was walking down a corridor with Dan. We were talking about the drama, when he said, "You know, I heard you say something in the bleachers that I took as quite a compliment." I said, "What was that?"

"When you said, 'Of course he does, it was handed to him.' "

I said, "Well, it's true. You and the elders have taught us so much about God and about how to live our lives."  Then I began to cry and I said, "But it's so hard now that you're gone. I don't always know what to do." And right then, Dan disappeared. I was really upset. I wished I hadn't said anything about him being gone so he could still be there for me to talk to. I cried, "I don't know what to do."

Then I heard Dan's voice say, "It's been handed to you."

And right then, I woke up.

This dream felt so real to me, and I knew it was true. Through everything we've learned from Dan and the other elders, through the encouraging words we've gotten from our friends, and from the encouragement we've gotten directly from God... we DO know what to do. It has been handed to us.

I don't know why it's so hard not to give the world more input than it should have. The ways of the world are not God's ways. This dream was a good reminder to me to put my hope in what I've heard from God and from His people. And even more, it reminded me that what Dan instilled in us for 20+ years lives on.